


The Case of the BBQ Sauce on Darcy's Titties

by Incog_Ninja



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-08
Updated: 2019-07-08
Packaged: 2020-06-24 19:22:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19730197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Incog_Ninja/pseuds/Incog_Ninja
Summary: PROMPT: Here’s a thought: Darcy x Thor, and you have to use the line, “So, I’m sitting there, barbecue sauce on my titties…” you choose the rating/content. I’m up for anything with Thor and Darcy 💙





	The Case of the BBQ Sauce on Darcy's Titties

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Glass_Jacket](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glass_Jacket/gifts).



Jane is honestly dumbfounded. You’d think at this point in her life and career, seeing what she’s seen, having Darcy The Impulsive as her best friend and an actual god for a boyfriend that nothing would shock her.

All things considered, this is actually a tame story, but the fact that Darcy and Thor are trying to tell it in tandem is what’s really sent Jane for a loop.

“So, I’m sitting there with barbecue sauce on my titties-” Darcy starts

“Darcy Lewis,” Thor interjects. “Please, allow me to tell the tale without the, um…”

Jane watches this all go down like a tennis match. Thor is determined to tell the tale and Darcy just needs to get something off her chest, so to speak. Thor is also inexplicably discomfited by Darcy’s moniker for her chest, it seems, which further bemuses Jane.

“We can’t tell the story without mentioning my tits,” Darcy states plainly. “That’s the story. My tits are the story. This story without mentioning my tits would be like you in battle without Mew-Mew.”

Thor’s face appropriately sours at Darcy’s nickname for Mjölnir. But he rebounds as he always does. “All right, then, please proceed,” he relents with a generous wave of his hand.

“So,” Darcy regains her momentum. “Barbecue sauce, tits, it was a mess. Thor decides that it’s, I dunno, somehow unseemly for me to have made a mess-”

“I did not find it unseemly that you’d _made_ a mess but that you _were_ a mess,” the god gently corrects. “There’s a difference; I was simply trying to help… tidy you up.”

Jane’s eyes go wide and laughter bubbles in her chest. “You didn’t.”

“Yes, he did!” Darcy points at Jane. “See?!? Hilarious, right? He’s so bothered by the impropriety that he’s there with like 19 packets of wet wipes, trying to ‘tidy me up’ or whatever.”

“Oh, that’s…” Jane chuckles, and now Thor looks baffled. “That’s very sweet of you.” Jane wraps her small hand around his much larger one.

Thor brightens up then. “It was!” he declares. “I was helping.”

“Yes, you were,” Jane replies, snagging Darcy’s gaze as Darcy sips her beer and rolls her eyes.

“Yeah, while copping a feel,” she mutters under her breath.

Thankfully, Thor doesn’t hear the part about copping a feel; he’d be mortified. Jane just shakes her head and laughs at them both.


End file.
